A lesson learned...!

One morning I woke up feeling uncertain about myself as if I have nothing left worth living for. It was early morning and an unusual start of the day for me. I don't even remember the last time when I woke up this early, I had developed a habit of sleeping late very late at night that meant I would wake up as late as possible in the morning. Previous night was just like any other night with an hour of gaming on my laptop followed by a Hollywood movie, The Social Network was the choice last night. Everything was usual and I went off to sleep after that.



As it was pretty early morning and everyone else at home was fast asleep except my granny. I told her that I am going for a walk in a nearby park and would be back in an hour or two and I left to breathe some fresh air. Of late the city had become so much polluted and congested one only breath polluted air and I hated it. I never thought I would feel like this but gradually I have started to hate everything about the city. The traffics to pathetic conditions of the roads  the over population and above all the concrete jungle. The development at the cost of destroying nature is not at all development.





I had barely left my home I met an old friend. We used to study together but he dropped out of school
at a young age and joined his father's business. I was in touch with him for a few years more but then I moved  out of the city for better future prospects and left track of not only him but most of my school time friends. In a city like ours with lesser quality higher education and career opportunities youngsters have no choice but to leave home for a brighter future. While interacting with him I came to know that he had married his childhood friend from another religion and was a proud father of a baby girl. He had shifted his home as the neighbors were making life difficult for his family after his inter religion marriage which was supported by the couple's family. They had absolutely no problem with them getting married and leading a happy married life. He told me that he was happy with what he did and what he achieved in life but feels bad the way his neighbor reacted on his marriage. It felt great meeting him, I too was happy for him and I left on my way promising him to drop by some time to his new place and meet his family and the little angel.


On my way further I came across a very old lady. On observing closely I recognized her. She lived in my neighborhood. I have been seeing her for many years now and apart from a walking stick that accompanied her everywhere she goes, she hasn't changed at all. She was unlike any other old lady in my neighborhood. Her husband was an ex-army officer who had died many years ago and her only child had been married of to a software developer in US. She lived alone but no one has ever noticed her sad and gloomy. She would always greet everyone with a cheerful Namaste and had a constant smile on her face. She was on her way to the temple chanting the word OM  as always. She also had that constant smile on her face perhaps a sign that she was thanking her God for the life she has lived and by the look on her face I guess she was happy and satisfied with the life she had lived.

As it was still early morning there were very few people in the municipality park which turned into a jogger's park every morning and evening. There was a couple of meter wide concrete track which was made on the entire circumference of the park which helped the people to walk without disturbing the plants and flowers while they strolled. I started walking like many others. After a few minutes I heard someone calling my name from behind. He was an old fellow sitting on a bench and waving at me to come closer. As I went close to him he greeted me with a smile and asked me "How are you my son??" It took me a minute or two to realize who he was. I was meeting him almost after a decade and his physical appearance had changed a lot. His hair had turned grey, he was having a beard, started wearing spectacles and had lost a lot of weight. He was a teacher from my school days and I was amazed that he recognized me even after so many years. Later on he told me that he also was not sure who I was but took a guess. I sat with him and inquired about his life and family. He told me that he has retired and now is working with an NGO which teaches slum children who cannot afford education. He also confessed that though he never liked his job yet he never disrespected it and moreover there was a part of his job which he loved dearly, it was teaching. Now when he has retired and his children are doing well in their lives he has finally found meaning and purpose to his life and according to him this is what he always wanted to do in life.

The discussion then moved on to me. He said  "Leave me apart my son! I have lived my life and have no complaints about it.Tell me about yourself. Where have you been? What you did after school? What are you doing these days?" I told him everything from college life to my work experience and even my current confused frame of mind. He has known me from my childhood and perhaps this was the reason he understood my current confused mindset as well. He observed me for a while than told me that its good to be confused only if its for the right reason. He also advised me to keep looking for something new if you are not satisfied with what you have but be grateful to God that you have what many aspire to have and find happiness in it and never disrespect what you have. Before leaving he said "Remember, only a happy person can find satisfaction and there is nothing left to find if you can find satisfaction"



The sun was out when he left and the park had become crowded. I started on my way back to home thinking about what my teacher had said. He was absolutely right. Indeed I was after satisfaction but in search of it I had left behind my happiness.Though he wasn't satisfied with his job yet  he loved the teaching part of it and never disrespected his job. My friend also had dared to do a inter religion marriage and was happy with it, so was the old lady despite being all alone. They might not be satisfied with what they have in life but they are happy with whatever they have.These thoughts kept running in my mind throughout the day. Finally I had realized that before trying to find something better I should respect whatever I have and find happiness in it even though if its in bits and pieces. Perhaps that is where I was making the mistake and I had realized it. My thought process had changed after the realization and I vowed to be a better person by respecting what I have and find happiness first then run after satisfaction.

I had realized that "ONE HAS TO BE HAPPY FIRST THEN ONLY HE/SHE CAN FIND SATISFACTION."


 
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